


Lover (I Don't Have to Love)

by MystEdits



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bottom Tyler, Fluff and Smut, Gay Sex, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Josh isn't in the band, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Public Blow Jobs, Shameless Smut, Short & Sweet, Songfic, pretty much just porn tbh, probably cliché, this got fluffier than I intended
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-20
Updated: 2017-03-27
Packaged: 2018-09-18 16:39:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9394001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MystEdits/pseuds/MystEdits
Summary: Tyler picked him out from the crowd before the show had even started.[inspired by the 2002 song "Lover I Don't Have to Love" by Bright Eyes]





	1. Lean

Tyler had picked him out of the crowd before the show had even started. He'd stood in the back near the bar, leaned up against a pillar, hands in his pockets. The crowd swayed and surged with the music, sweaty and wanton as the heat in the club rose with the sound volume. But not him. He'd just stood there, eyes locked to the stage. Locked to Tyler.

The lights danced across the boy's figure and face, occasionally catching a glint of something, maybe a piercing. Tyler couldn't tell. The boy's features weren't clear from where Tyler stood and sang, but Tyler was drawn to him regardless. He felt the boy's eyes and the intensity of his gaze. He felt the _want_ , and urged his own body not to respond in kind. _Not yet._

Normally, a guy standing alone in the back just staring might give him the creeps. It _should_ give him the creeps.

Normally, if he felt up to it, Tyler would pick someone else to entertain him after a show. Maybe one of the starry-eyed, barely clothed girls who converged near the front of the stage. Maybe one of the kids who not-so-subtly sold chemicals in the crowd. The free drugs he got out of it were a bonus.

But not tonight. Tonight felt different.

They played a 40-minute set. Tyler put everything he had into the performance, but he was distracted. His bandmates definitely noticed something off, shooting him questioning looks, but the crowd didn't seem to mind, if they picked up on it at all. Most were halfway to a hangover or worse.

The last chords of the closing song spread across the sea of bobbing bodies and they roared, waves breaking against the the stage. Tyler beamed. Every show seemed to bring out more people now. Maybe one day they would sell out this place. High on concert adrenaline, the thought of selling out a 1500-capacity club made him giddy.

Finally, after _thank yous_ and _goodbyes_ and one encore, he was free. He left the stage in a hurry, eager to towel off the sweat running down his forehead and chest. Dallon, the band's bassist, followed him.

"Good show, man," he said, slapping his hand on Tyler's shoulder and giving it a squeeze.

Tyler turned and nodded. "Yeah, good turnout. Any idea how many?"

"Few hundred, maybe," Dallon shrugged. "We can check tomorrow with whoever runs this place, get real numbers. Tyler, hey—"

Tyler hadn't really been listening and had started to walk away, but turned back abruptly. "What's up?"

"You all right?" Dallon cocked his head.

"Yeah," Tyler answered, forcing a toothy smile. "Why wouldn't I be? Feeling great. Good show."

Dallon smirked. "You've got someone on your head, man. I know that look."

Tyler blushed.

"Just help us load the van before you take off, yeah?" he continued. "Before whoever it is actually _gets _on__ your head."

"Fuck off," Tyler laughed. "I'll be out there. Give me a few."

 _Am I really that obvious? Goddamn_ , he thought. He couldn't deny the suggestion of someone riding his cock did make it stir. He'd been willing it to stay down all night. He needed to get back out on the floor and find that guy, if he was even still there.

Back in the dressing room — more of a closet with a fold-up table, some haphazardly placed chairs, and a grimy mini-fridge in the corner — he pulled out a water bottle, tore the cap off, and poured it straight on his head. As beads of water ran down his neck and chest and he grabbed for a towel, he belatedly realized he could have soaked himself on stage like some washed-up 90s rock star. It was so cliché, but they would have loved it.

 _Bet_ he _would have loved it_.

Tyler scowled. _Next time._

After throwing on a fresh shirt, he weaved back through the narrow hallway to the stage, and hopped down the stairs. While most had gone back to the bar or dance floor as the club's music started back up, a few people were still milling about the stage, eager to talk to the band.

While shaking hands and offering more smiles and _thank yous_ , he looked toward the back of the club, but without the lighting from the show the pillar where his quarry had lingered was in darkness.

"Hey, guys, I have to get going, but thanks again for coming out!" Tyler extracted himself from the small group of fans and booked it to the back of the club. After a few feet he saw that the pillar was standing alone. The boy was gone.

 _Shit!_ Tyler cursed himself for taking so long to come back out. He walked further back to the bar and looked around. Nothing.

 _Shit_ , _shit_ , _shit_.

He slumped onto a bar stool, disappointed, then felt the air shift behind him and startled.

"Looking for something?"

Tyler spun the stool around and his breath caught in his chest. It was the boy he'd been looking for, and he was _hot_. He stood with one hip cocked, thumbs hooked through the belt loops of his black skinny jeans. Tyler looked him up and down, taking a mental picture. Red hair, backwards cap, loose grey tank emblazoned with a spaceship and the words _I WANT TO BELIEVE_. His shoes were high tops, and matched his hair: bright red. He wore a look of friendly mischief. Tyler immediately warmed to him.

"Oh, hey," Tyler answered. "You were at the show."

The boy smirked. "I was."

"I saw you watching," Tyler continued. "I like your... uh... shoes." He immediately regretted saying it, and felt heat rise to his cheeks as the smirk on the boy's face grew. _Shoes? Fucking really, Tyler? Shoes?!_

"Thanks," he answered. "My favourite pair."

Tyler nodded and stood. The boy didn't back up, and suddenly Tyler was close against him, not quite touching. Too close. Tyler was taller than him, just barely, and could feel the heat radiating off his body. His eyes were a deep brown, his pupils dilated. His entire presence practically screamed sex.

So why did Tyler feel so awkward and tense? This wasn't anything new. Find someone after a show, have a couple drinks, maybe pop a pill or two, and fuck.

Finally after what felt like an eternity, the boy stepped back and moved his arm — his fully, beautifully tattooed arm, Tyler realized — as if to usher him forward.

"Can I follow you?" he asked, half-smirk, half-smile. His eyes crinkled.

Tyler knew the boy could sense his hesitation, and that he _liked_ it. _Snap out of it, Ty._ He cleared his throat then raised an eyebrow and grinned, hoping it might come across as seductive.

"Let's get out of here. I need to grab my shit first."

Tyler moved back toward the stage and the band's dressing room, leading the way. He shook himself off and regained some bounce in his step, smiling wide. Whoever this guy was, he was hot as fuck, and he clearly wanted _to_ fuck.

It was going to be a good night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed reading this! Please comment and kudos if you did. :)  
> I edit my work pretty carefully but things do slip through, so feel free to point out any errors so I can correct them.  
> Planning 3, maybe 4 chapters, so this should be completed fairly quickly.


	2. Suck

Navigating through the narrow hallway again, Tyler could feel his companion's eyes on his ass. He felt oddly self-conscious. He slid into the cramped dressing room and the door clicked shut behind him. He'd barely turned around before the boy was backing him up against the wall, nearly toppling over a chair in the process. He slid his knee between Tyler's legs and pinned Tyler's hands above his head, immediately going to work kissing and sucking bruises onto his neck.

Slightly taken aback, but not about to complain, Tyler giggled and pushed his hips forward to grind on the redhead's knee. He wasn't used to a hookup taking so much initiative. Usually they were shy and blushing, too scared to really take the reins. He liked being the one in charge, but this was... thrilling.

The boy released his hold on Tyler's wrists and trailed a hand down his chest, catching on the hem of his shirt to lightly tease his fingers along the edge of Tyler's low-slung jeans.

"Not shy are yo— ohhh," Tyler moaned as the man cupped him through his jeans and gave a firm squeeze. He bit Tyler's collarbone lightly.

"Wanna suck you," he breathed into Tyler's ear, then licked and nibbled gently on his earlobe.

"By— by all means," Tyler stuttered. It came out a lot more desperate than he intended, and he heard a muffled chuckle in response. Tyler pulled off the boy's cap as he got on his knees in front of Tyler's crotch and ran his fingers through his red, curled hair. For Tyler, the sight of someone on their knees for him never got old.

He let his head fall back against the wall and closed his eyes as the boy in front of him stroked Tyler's cock lightly through his clothes and kissed his abdomen. It didn't take long for him to get fully hard. "Fucking tease," Tyler whispered. He pressed his hips forward and heard another chuckle.

Finally, he was undoing Tyler's jeans, pulling them down with his boxers in one swift motion. Tyler's cock sprang free and he gasped at the sudden rush of cool air, turning into a moan as a warm, wet mouth closed around the tip and a hand wrapped firmly around his base.

Tyler tightened his grip on the redhead's hair. This guy obviously had some practice and was quickly making Tyler come undone as he worked. "Made for this," Tyler mumbled.

The mouth around his cock hummed in response, making Tyler shudder as the vibration passed through his skin, then pulled off with an exaggerated _pop_. Tyler whined at the sudden loss of sensation until a large, strong hand began stroking his length and he felt a nose nuzzling against his base. One at a time the redhead took Tyler's balls into his mouth, rolling them against his tongue and sucking gently. Tyler nearly lost it, biting his fist to stifle a moan. A moment later the redhead licked a thick stripe from the base of Tyler's cock to his slit and began sucking him again in earnest. Tyler tried to keep himself from forcing himself in deeper, but couldn't help putting some pressure on the back of the boy's head, and Tyler swore as his cock hit the back of his throat and Tyler heard him gag, feeling his throat contract around him. But he just kept going, somehow even more enthusiastic than before.

A few minutes later, Tyler was writhing, biting his lip and squeezing his eyes shut as the pressure in his abdomen built.

"Jesus Christ, I'm gonna—"

Then Tyler was coming in the man's mouth, hips jerking.

After a few more soft, gentle sucks the man pulled off, Tyler cradling his head. He looked down into the deep brown eyes and bit his lip at the sight of the man's swollen lips, some spit and cum running down his chin. He noted the nose ring that he'd wondered about earlier.

The man below him rocked back on his heels, smiling. "Good?"

"Fantastic," Tyler breathed. He tucked himself back in and rearranged his clothes, then reached for a bottle of water and a towel, tossing them to the redhead. "Here... sorry, should have warned you sooner."

"All good."

Tyler went about tossing his things into a bag. "What's you name, anyway?" he asked. They'd barely said a word to each other.

The redhead didn't answer, but ran his hand through his hair and replaced his cap. "What time is it?" he asked.

"Dunno." Tyler shrugged. "Probably close to 2am. The club's closing soon, I'm surprised no one's come looking for me."

As if on cue the door burst open, making him jump.

"Dude!" It was Dallon. "Have you seen— oh." He blushed awkwardly and Tyler said a quiet thanks that his bandmate hadn't walked in two minutes prior.

"What's up?" Tyler asked, the picture of innocence.

"Uh," Dallon glanced at Tyler's companion, "been trying to find that kid who was dealing earlier. We're leaving soon though, van's packed. Thanks for helping, by the way. Asshole."

Tyler's face reddened. "Sorry, we— I was—"

" _Busy_ , yeah." Dallon finished for him. "Anyway, you coming or not? We'll score if I can find that fucking kid. He said to meet him back by..."

Tyler had stopped listening. He was watching the redhead, who was standing off to the side, suddenly extremely interested in his nail beds. He looked up into Tyler's eyes. "I should go..."

"No! You can— I mean—" Tyler surprised himself at the force of his answer. He turned to Dallon. "I'll figure something out, you guys go."

"Ty, you don't have a car here, what—"

"I said _I'll figure something out_." Tyler glared daggers.

"Okay, whatever dude." Dallon threw up his hands and backed out of the room.

Tyler turned to the redhead, who looked extremely uncomfortable. "Sorry about him. Do you, uh... you want to get out of here? My place isn't far. We can take the train. I'll catch up with the guys in the morning." He seemed surprised, but grinned and nodded.

Tyler swung his bag over his shoulder, flicked the lights, and made his way to the club's side exit, his companion following close behind.

Soon they were down the block at the station, leaning against the barrier that kept people from falling onto the tracks. It was quiet, but a comfortable silence. Tyler felt relaxed, more so than he'd felt in a long time.

He looked up from the tracks to find the redhead staring at him, a crooked smile on his face. The boy blushed and turned away. Tyler grinned, turned his back to the barrier, and pulled the redhead onto his chest.

"You're cute," he whispered. Then Tyler was kissing him, one hand on the back of his neck pulling him in close, the other lazily drawing circles on the man's forearm with his thumb. The kiss grew more heated and their tongues clashed, and Tyler felt the man pushing his hips against his own, pressing hard against his jeans, trying to get some relief.

Tyler wasn't a kisser. He certainly wasn't one to make out with someone he just met, whether they'd sucked him off or not. But here he was, grinning and humming as the redhead took control of the kiss and nibbled on Tyler's lip, his hands everywhere.

After a few moments, the train pulled in, and they parted hesitantly, taking seats across from each other.

 _The fuck am I doing?_ Tyler cursed himself, fiddling with his phone. Bringing someone home? Making out? He didn't do this.

_I should have just let him leave and gone with_ _Dallon. How many people have I screwed around with after shows, dozens? How many have been this guy before? And I never take them home. Never._

"It's Josh, by the way," a voice interrupted his thoughts.

Tyler startled, looking up. "What?"

"Josh. My name is Josh."


	3. Grind

They stumbled out of the elevator, both squinting at the fluorescent lights. Tyler fished for his keys and grinned as Josh pressed himself against his back, thumbs hooking in the loops of Tyler’s jeans and nibbling on his neck. Tyler had worried about the trip home being awkward, but Josh was all easy laughs and smiling eyes. Tyler couldn’t take his eyes off him, and had barely kept his hands to himself.

Tyler led them in and flicked on the lights, cringing at the mess he’d left earlier in his hurry to get out the door. It wasn’t a complete disaster, but there were dirty dishes in the sink and clothes strewn around from the half-dozen wardrobe changes. Josh didn’t seem to mind, though. He kicked off his shoes and walked in like he owned the place, taking a look around the open-concept apartment.

“Nice place,” he noted, then threw himself down on the couch.

Tyler mumbled an incoherent answer as he took off his jacket and tossed his keys and wallet onto the kitchen counter. It wasn’t fancy, but it was his home.

“So...” Josh drawled, smirking. “This is it, huh? The bachelor pad of the famous Tyler Joseph.”

Tyler blushed and moved to the sink, grabbing two glasses and pouring them both some water. “Famous? Hardly.”

“I’ve seen a couple of your shows. You guys have something.”

Josh wasn’t wrong; their crowds had been growing, and they’d been playing more frequently and farther away. Tyler moved to stand in front of Josh, and offered him the glass.

“So, what, you’re stalking me?”

Josh grinned, taking the drink. “Something like that, yeah.”

The way Josh’s eyes crinkled and his tongue barely poked out from between his lips as he laughed gave Tyler butterflies. He turned away, blushing, to set his glass down. “Well you’ve certainly made yourself at home.”

Josh patted the couch next to him, grinning devilishly. “Why don’t you join me?”

That was all the invitation Tyler needed. He crawled into Josh’s lap, straddling his thighs, and immediately ground his crotch against the redhead’s own. Josh moaned lightly and cupped Tyler’s ass, squeezing for good measure. He raised an eyebrow.

“What?” Tyler asked, suddenly nervous.

Josh squeezed him again, and with a glint in his eye said, “I mean, it’s not a bad ass.”

“Oh my god, you’re the worst,” was all Tyler could answer, and he was kissing him, hard. Josh’s giggle turned into a moan as Tyler nibbled at his bottom lip and pulled away gently, moving to breathe hot against his neck. He sucked lightly, not sure if Josh was into it, but he just stretched his neck and gave Tyler more access. He sucked in earnest, nipping at his earlobe and sucking a bruise into the tender skin between his neck and collar bone.

Josh’s hands ran up and down Tyler’s back; the feeling gave him chills. A moment later Tyler was shrugging out of his shirt, back arched, and Josh licked Tyler’s exposed chest and went to work nibbling on a nipple, tracing the outline of Tyler’s hourglass tattoo with his thumb.

“Your ink is so fucking hot,” he mumbled against Tyler’s chest. “Wanna explore all of you.”

“I could say the same,” Tyler answered, nodding to Josh’s sleeve. Then he was pulling out of Josh’s embrace to stand and back away, leaving him flushed and confused.

“Why’re you—”

“I need a quick shower first, if this is gonna go any further.”

Josh groaned, rubbing at his forehead. “And you called _me_ a tease.”

“Help yourself to whatever’s in the fridge, if you want!” Tyler chirped, winking at an obviously frustrated Josh as he stepped into the bathroom.

He stripped and turned on the spray, stepping under the showerhead with his face up, just absorbing the feeling of water running through his hair and down his skin. It felt good after a show, and Tyler was relieved Josh didn’t seem angry about it. He needed this.

After quickly soaping himself up he lazily palmed at his cock, still half hard. Then the shower door was sliding open, and Josh was stepping in behind him, wrapping his arms around Tyler’s waist.

“Starting without me?”

Tyler grinned, turning into Josh’s embrace. “Wasn’t sure you had the balls to join me, but...” He stepped back and made a show of looking Josh up and down. _Damn._ “Doesn’t look like that’s a problem.”

Josh smirked, eyeing Tyler hungrily, the spray quickly soaking his red locks and causing his curls to hang down in his eyes. Behind his show of confidence, Tyler couldn’t help but notice just how beautiful Josh was — all lean muscle and hard edges. He could spend hours exploring Josh’s sinful V-line and hipbones alone. It was enough to make a man crumble.

But he didn’t have time for that, as Josh was pushing him back against the tile wall, hands on Tyler’s naked hips and fiercely pressing his lips against his mouth. Tyler gasped at the feeling of the cold tile hitting his skin, but quickly got caught up exploring the man’s mouth.

Tyler pulled away, giggle quickly turning to a moan and knees nearly buckling as Josh moved his lips across Tyler’s jaw to nibble on his earlobe. He could feel Josh smiling against his neck. “You like that?”

A breathy “yes” was all Tyler could manage to articulate. His hands were everywhere, running across Josh’s arms, his shoulders, his back, his ass; taking in the perfection that was his body.

Both were fully hard now, and it was taking everything in Tyler not to grasp them both. He was still pinned against the tile, water washing over them, and Josh was grinding their groins together, one hand rubbing circles on Tyler’s hip.

Josh lifted Tyler’s leg onto his own hip and started to inch his fingers across the man’s thick thighs. “How do you want to do this?” he asked, massaging Tyler’s flushed skin.

Tyler stilled. Suddenly he felt vulnerable, and it must have shown on his face because Josh immediately guided Tyler’s leg off his hip back to the tile floor and took a step back.

“You okay?” he asked. “We don’t have to take this further... I mean, it’s already been a pretty great night.”

Josh was smiling, but Tyler blushed and glanced down, embarrassed. “No, it’s not that,” he mumbled. _What the hell is wrong with me? What is this guy_ doing _to me? I’m losing it in my own house!_

Josh carefully cupped Tyler’s jaw and lifted his face. “Hey, it’s okay, man. Whatever you want.”

Looking into Josh’s eyes, Tyler felt something inside him crack, like a dam being broken. He wanted this, hungered for it. He _needed_ this.

He crashed their lips together, gripping at the back of Josh’s head and pulling him in tight. Josh took a moment to respond, but quickly kissed him back just as eagerly, bringing their wet bodies together again. This time Tyler hiked his own leg up on Josh’s hip, pulling himself impossibly closer, the panes of their chests hot and slick against each other. “I want you,” he breathed against Josh’s skin. “I want you to fuck me.”

Josh shuddered and bit at Tyler’s neck, shifting the hand holding up Tyler’s thigh to ghost his fingers down through his legs and over his entrance. He captured Tyler’s lips in another deep kiss as he slowly slid a finger inside, and it didn’t take long before he added another. Gentle, but firm.

Tyler felt lightheaded, waves of pleasure rocking through his body, and soon he was pressing down on Josh’s hand, fucking himself on Josh’s fingers as he desperately clung to the redhead’s neck.

“Want to fuck you so bad,” Josh mumbled against his skin.

Tyler grinned and pulled away enough to look Josh in the face. “Bed?” he asked, somehow managing  to raise an eyebrow.

Josh nodded. “Bed.” He gently withdrew his fingers and they stumbled out of the shower, grabbing the closest towels and nearly forgetting to turn off the spray in their haste.

Tyler led the way to his bedroom, toweling off as he walked, Josh behind him. Tossing the towel down, he fell back on the bed. Josh stood at the end, roughly rubbing the towel through his hair. Tyler couldn’t help but giggle as Josh climbed over him, his hair every which way.

Josh held himself up over Tyler and winked. “All dry!”

Tyler rolled his eyes and wrapped his legs around Josh’s hips, pulling him down. “Shut up and fuck me, will you?”

Josh moaned into Tyler’s neck, licking and sucking as Tyler reached to his bedside table for a condom and some lube. “Are you ready?” he asked.

Tyler paused. It had been a while. “Not yet.”

“Flip over, then,” Josh commanded, lifting himself off of Tyler’s chest.

Tyler was happy to oblige, making a show of getting on his hands and knees, arching his back and wiggling his ass as Josh’s strong hands spread him, until a moment later when he jolted forward as Josh licked a thick stripe from the base of his balls up across his hole.

“Jesus, fuck!” Tyler moaned, white knuckling the sheets. He felt Josh grin against his ass as he continued to eat him out, teasing his fingers at Tyler’s entrance before sliding two in. Tyler was coming apart underneath him, wanton and writhing. Everything was blurry; there was only the fingers inside him, the hot tongue circling them and pressing against his sensitive bundle of nerves. Josh scissored his fingers and fucked Tyler with his tongue between them, then pulled back to blow cool air across Tyler’s exposed hole. Tyler bucked and shivered, the sensation almost too much as Josh went back to licking and sucking at his skin, fingers pumping. “Josh— mmfuck, Josh I’m— Christ, if you keep this up I’m gonna come!”

Josh pulled back, and Tyler could hear the smile in his voice as he said, “Couldn’t resist, your pretty little ass, all pink and shining, fresh out of the shower...” He bit down hard on Tyler’s cheek and Tyler yelped, then moaned as a third finger slid inside him.

“Please,” he begged. He was frantic, eyes already watering, desperately wanting to touch himself. “I’m ready— FUCK,” he keened and bit the pillow as Josh’s fingers crooked and massaged that spot inside him. “Josh please!”

Agonizingly slow, Josh pulled his fingers out, and grabbed at the condom and lube, giving Tyler a moment to recover. He sagged his head on the pillow and breathed heavy, beads of sweat collecting at the base of his spine. Then there were two hands grasping his hips and pulling him back as Josh began to slide in, both pushing himself into Tyler’s body and pulling him onto his cock.

Josh paused with his hips flush against Tyler’s ass, letting him adjust. “You good?” Tyler nodded, then Josh was pulling out again, slow at first, then picking up speed. Tyler braced himself against the headboard, his breath leaving in soft moans and huffs each time Josh filled him.

He turned his head to watch Josh fuck him. They locked eyes and Tyler moaned like a porn star and bit his lip.

Josh’s breath hitched at the sight before him. “You feel so good, baby. So tight.”

Tyler pushed himself back, eagerly meeting every thrust.

Josh leaned forward and bit at Tyler’s shoulder. “Ride me? Wanna see you come.”

Tyler could only nod, and Josh was pulling out and laying back on the bed. Tyler carefully raised himself, legs shaking, and positioned himself over Josh’s hips. Tyler’s cock was bright red and leaking precum, begging to be touched.

They both swore as Tyler sunk down on Josh, and Tyler rocked his hips, adjusting his angle until Josh was pressing up against his prostate with every movement, then Josh was thrusting his hips up to meet Tyler’s movements. The room was quiet, save for skin slapping skin and muffled grunts and moans.

Tyler threw his head back and worked himself, hands splayed on Josh’s smooth chest. “M’close— touch me, please,” he begged, and Josh was there, expertly working his fist up and down Tyler’s length.

A moment later Tyler’s whole body stilled and then jerked violently as he came, shooting hot cum across Josh’s hand and stomach.

“Jesus fuck,” Josh gasped, and thrust up into Tyler hard, chasing his own release. The feel of Tyler clenching around him as his body shuddered with aftershocks was enough to push him over the edge, and soon he was spilling deep inside Tyler.

Tyler collapsed onto Josh’s chest and they both breathed heavy, heads spinning. He giggled against Josh’s warm skin as Josh ran his fingers through Tyler’s hair, massaging his scalp, then grimaced as he slowly raised himself off.

“You okay? Did I hurt you?” Josh was immediately concerned, cradling Tyler’s face in his hand.

“No, I’m great,” Tyler answered, his hand overlapping Josh’s. “Just been a while since I bottomed. That was... damn.” He laughed.

Josh smirked. “Oh. Well, uh, thanks... I guess?”

Tyler burst out laughing. “Fuck dude, you’re something else!” Soon they were both on their backs, clutching their stomachs and laughing so hard they cried.

A little while later, cleaned up and their giggles finally calmed, Tyler was close to falling asleep when Josh sat up, reaching for his clothes. “I should go,” he muttered.

“No!” Tyler whined, embarrassed at how desperate he sounded. He cleared his throat. “I mean, it’s late. You can stay, if you want.”

“If you’re sure,” he answered, hopeful.

“Yeah,” Tyler said, blushing. “Stay.”

Back in bed and with Tyler draped over his chest, Josh was out light a light. Tyler lay there, listening to the rhythm of Josh’s heartbeat, his head rising and falling with Josh’s slow breaths. He looked up at the sleeping man and traced the lines of the tree in his tattoo. It was beautiful. Josh was beautiful, hair still damp and curled from the shower. His eyelids fluttered, and Tyler’s heart clenched.

_What am I doing?_

He was asleep before he had time to think about it.

 

* * * * *

 

Tyler woke to an ache in his lower back and an empty spot next to him. Sun was streaming through his blinds, making the bits of dust in the air glitter as they flew. He rubbed his eyes as he ran over the events of the previous night in his mind.

 _I guess that’s that_ , he thought. He wasn’t surprised, but it was disappointing. Something had happened between them in the short time they knew each other, but Tyler supposed it had only been one-sided. Josh hadn’t felt it.

He was about to roll himself back up in the blankets and sulk for the day when he heard the clatter of dishes outside his door. Suddenly hopeful, he shot out of bed, pulling on some fresh boxers, and padded out to the kitchen.

Josh was there, leaning over something on the counter. Fresh coffee was just starting to drip into the pot, and the aroma filled Tyler’s nostrils. “Hey,” he grunted, voice cracking. “Morning.”

Josh looked up and grinned. “Not a morning person?”

Tyler shrugged, moving to the coffee pot and eagerly awaiting the drip to finish. “Nah.”

A comfortable silence had settled between them when Josh muttered, “You write such pretty words, Tyler.”

“Huh?” Tyler turned, confused. Josh was leaned over a notepad, and Tyler recognized it as one he’d been jotting ideas for lyrics down on. “Oh, those are just scribbles... random shit.” He felt a bit embarrassed, but couldn’t blame Josh for looking — he’d left the pad of paper out on the counter, after all, and there wasn’t much more than a couple of verses. Josh pushed the pad of paper toward Tyler and he took it, reading over what he’d written.

 _won’t walk the world any different_  
_my path won’t change until you make a wall_  
_and make me fall_  
_and break me down_

_I believe in love_  
_and I hope I can show you what I mean_  
_but I don’t believe love’s for me_  
_so won’t you come around and prove me wrong_

He shrugged. “Pretty? Kinda depressing, really.” He forced a short laugh.

“Maybe,” Josh hummed. “But life’s no storybook.”

“No, it’s not,” Tyler answered. Josh didn’t press, but he felt like he needed to explain. “I guess I’m just... this sounds awful, but I’ve only had lovers I don’t have to actually _love_... does that make sense? People too drunk... too sad to give a fuck.”

He rolled his shoulders and rubbed at the back of his neck, anxious at Josh’s reaction, but the man just nodded, his face neutral. He pulled the pad of paper toward him again. “You really feel this way?”

Tyler leaned over to see what Josh was pointing at. It was a single line, scribbled sideways:

_love’s an excuse to get hurt_

Tyler bit his lip and shrugged, looking down. Josh gently grasped Tyler’s jaw and brought his face up to kiss him softly. Their lips moved slowly against each other, and Tyler wrapped his arms around Josh’s torso. He felt comfortable here.

Josh broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against Tyler’s. “Do you like to hurt?” he asked.

“I—” Tyler paused. “I guess I do.”

“Then hurt me.”

 

 

_Fin_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I'm sorry about the ridiculous wait, but we've finally come to the end of this short story. I hope you enjoyed it. 
> 
> Now that this is finished I can focus solely on The Distance Between, a book I'm really excited for and one I hope you'll check out. It's going to be a bit slow-going but I'm trying to get more up very soon. In the meantime, if you're looking for some more smut, check out Giving Thanks... it's filthy. 
> 
> Let me know what you think in the comments! xx


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